How you do Anything is how you do Everything

I came across a web seminar for women on strategies for living recently.  I was surprised to actually hear some things that really stuck with me lately so I thought I would share:

One thing I liked were some morning patterns that will help really start your day off right.
1. Drink a big glass of water when you wake up in the morning. Good for cleaning out toxins, clear thinking, renewing, restoring, etc. We all know water is amazing.
2. Eat a nourishing breakfast.
3. Get the gunk out. She suggests journaling to get your mind clear of anything heavy. 
4. Get the good in. Prayer and meditation. Scripture study.
5. Movement.  Not necessarily a whole exercise session, just stretching or walking to get in tune with your body and get blood moving.

I have really been liking all of these.  I combine #3 and 4 as I pray and study, but these are all a very refreshing.  The water and good breakfast make a HUGE difference.  I also find that if it is really healthy and I eat all that I want, I am not craving junk throughout the day as much.   For movement, I just do about 10 minutes of pregnancy exercises, pretty easy. If I get up a few minutes early and do these things, I feel very centered and ready to take on all that the day brings.

(credit)

The next thing I liked was a metaphor about life.  She said your day is like a fence.  The vertical posts strengthen you, meet your needs, and nourish you (self care).  The horizontal posts are all of your other responsibilities each day.  The more out of balance you are, the more vertical posts you need.  As you become good at managing, you don't need as many vertical posts to stay anchored and your horizontal pieces can be longer in between. 

I wasn't totally buying this analogy. I know we all need self care, but sometimes I think it is overemphasized to the point that we are encouraged to be selfish beings.  I think with God, we can overcome a lot of our selfish tendencies.  I am not saying self care is not important though.  Anyway, I just struggled a bit with this concept.

I changed my mind about it with her next point, however, which is why I even cared to write about it.As she clarified "the fence",  She said the biggest problem is that people mistakenly fragment their lives as in getting though one part just to enjoy the fun parts.  That is the big mistake.  What we need to realize is that our lives are meant to be lived as one piece.  All the parts should flow with joy.  We can find self care while we are taking care of children, cleaning toilets, running errands, or making dinner.  We can find joy in moving our bodies, creating, accomplishing and being present at every moment.  We should not hit the pause button on our joy until we can get to the next self care "post".  If you do, when you come back to normal life, you will still feel unfulfilled.

I admit this really hit me.  I didn't realize how much I was fragmenting my life.  Here I am living the life that I have always wanted and I find myself feeling overwhelmed wanting to get away from it.  I am sometimes living just to get to a break.  That just doesn't make sense.

"How you do ANYTHING is how you do EVERYTHING."

What a great concept.  Just having that simple attitude change has really helped me.  When I am disciplining children, I am enjoying the teaching moments that can bring us closer together.  When I am changing diapers, I am enjoying the one on one time.  When I am cleaning, I am enjoying the methodical organizing movements.  If I keep this in mind, it really does help me to enjoy life. Not that I am all of the sudden perfect. This is especially hard right now as I fight wanting to just get through the next few weeks of pregnancy, but I am trying and it helps to find the joys in every moment and staying present. 

In the throws of struggle and life's challenges (I have a few right now), I found some peace in these thoughts so I just wanted to pass it along.

Quote

"I understand the concept of cooking and cleaning, but I don't see how it applies to me."

-a comment on facebook, taken from a fridge magnet

Love unexpressed

"Love Unexpressed is Love Unknown."

I like this quote and it reminded me of  this Education Week talk called "The Functional Family." . In it, James Macarthur explains that one basic human need is to feel significant and important and how we can show our children that they are important to us.  This whole talk is full of great parenting advice and gives 10 qualities of a functional family, but if you start around 19 minutes you can hear him explain that we must tell our children these things regularly and that you cannot do it too often.  I first listened to this talk a couple of years ago and I have really come to enjoy expressing how important my children are to me.   I love watching their face and the visible satisfaction that they get from hearing it.  I try so hard to be a good parent, but often feel like I am falling short in many ways.  I find comfort in knowing that when my children are grown, they will at least know that they are important and loved, without a doubt.

Cooking with Kids

Now that Dallin is out of school for the summer we are starting our summer fun activities.  One thing I am planning is a weekly cooking activity for the kids where they each make their own little recipe to eat.  I checked out "Cooking Rocks" by Racheal Ray from the library, which is a cook book for kids.  Anyway, I love her intro and want to share a couple exerpts from it:

"People often ask me where and when I learned to cook.  The truth is, I never did.  No one "taught" me how to cook.  No one person ever showed me how to hold a knife or how to tell when chicken was done.  No one explained to me which flavors were good together and which were not.  How then did I learn?  The answer has to do with my family.

The kitchen was the center of my childhood home.  As kids, my brother and sister and I were spoiled in an unusual way. We were treated as respected members of the group.  All the adults in our home listened when we spoke, giving us the same attention they gave other adults.  In turn, when they spoke, we listened.

This is not to say that we were treated as adults.  We were treated as children, with rules to follow, and were taught right from wrong. But, when given a direction to follow, we were spoken to in a way that assumed we were capable.  "Rachael, clean the potatoes and add them to the pot, please." is a very different statement from, "Rachael, can you clean the potatoes?" We were made to feel confident in our own abilities. We felt a responsibility to figure out  how to do things for ourselves. I work with this in mind to this day. I look at a task at hand and say to myself, "I can figure this out." Then I get busy and figure it out.

Cooking can give kids a wonderful sense of accomplishment.  They can see the results of their labors and creativity immediately - tangible, great-tasting food that others can share and enjoy. Kids develop a real sense of pride when given a pat on the back for something they did all by themselves. despite their small size and age.  "

"Never grab a kid's arm or speak harshly to a kid cook unless he or she is in real danger o f burn or injury. Let them make mistakes. You can always scoop out too much of something, add a little more of something else, or start from scratch if necessary.  All of these options are better solutions than making kids feel as self-conscious as so many adults are about cooking.  Food should be fun. Cooking is a celebration of all the good things we have to be thankful for in life, including little kids." - Racheal Ray


So wise, right?  Even though she doesn't have kids, this is great parenting advice in general.

Overindulgence and Parenting

In our day, many children grow up with distorted values because we as parents overindulge them. Whether you are well-to-do or, like most of us, of more modest means, we as parents often attempt to provide children with almost everything they want thus taking away from them the blessing of anticipating, of longing for something they do not have. One of the most important things we can teach our children is to deny themselves. Instant gratification generally makes for weak people. How many truly great individuals do you know who never had to struggle? ~Joe J. Christensen, “Greed, Selfishness, and Overindulgence,” Ensign, May 1999, 9~

"As parents, we become the authors of the stories that will dwell in our children throughout their lives."

Daily Gem

This was in my email Daily Gem today. I thought this was very powerful, definitely my new favorite quote:

“Brethren and sisters, material possessions and honors of the world do not endure. But your union as wife, husband, and family can. The only duration of family life that satisfies the loftiest longings of the human soul is forever. No sacrifice is too great to have the blessings of an eternal marriage. To qualify, one needs only to deny oneself of ungodliness and honor the ordinances of the temple. By making and keeping sacred temple covenants, we evidence our love for God, for our companion, and our real regard for our posterity—even those yet unborn. Our family is the focus of our greatest work and joy in this life; so will it be throughout all eternity, when we can ‘inherit thrones, kingdoms, principalities … powers, dominions … exaltation and glory’ (D&C 132:19).”
Russell M. Nelson, “Set in Order Thy House,” Liahona, Jan. 2002, 82

"Do you want a spirit of love to grow in the world? Then begin within the walls of your own home. Behold your little ones, and see within them the wonders of God, from whose presence they have so recently come."
-Gordon B. Hinckley

Just thought this was funny

“Never, never, interrupt me, okay? Not if there’s a fire, not even if you hear the sound of a thud from my home and one week later there’s a smell coming from there that can only be a decaying human body and you have to hold a hanky to your face because the stench is so thick that you think you’re going to faint. Even then, don’t come knocking.”

-Jack Nicholson in AS GOOD AS IT GETS

Provident Living

I got this quote in my Daily Gem email today and really liked it. I highlighted my favorite part.

“All of us are responsible to provide for ourselves and our families in both temporal and spiritual ways. To provide providently, we must practice the principles of provident living: joyfully living within our means, being content with what we have, avoiding excessive debt, and diligently saving and preparing for rainy-day emergencies. When we live providently, we can provide for ourselves and our families and also follow the Savior’s example to serve and bless others.”
Robert D. Hales, “Becoming Provident Providers Temporally and Spiritually,” Ensign, May 2009

"Think about your particular assignment at this time in your life. It may be to get an education, it may be to rear children in righteousness, it may be to be a grandparent, it may be to care for and relieve the suffering of someone you love, it may be to do a job in the most excellent way possible, it may be to support someone who has a difficult assignment of their own. Our assignments are varied and they change from time to time. Don't take them lightly. Give them your full heart and energy. Do them with enthusiasm. Do whatever you have to do this week with your whole heart and soul. To do less than this will leave you with and empty feeling."

-Marjorie Pay Hinckley

We don't decide to hurt, we do decide to hate.

Finances

Value who you are, define who you are, by your personality, by your actions more than what you have.

Rather than wanting more more more more, why don't you want more more more of a quality of life!

Suze Orman

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.It is our light not our darkness that most frightens us.We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous,talented and fabulous?Actually, who are you not to be?You are a child of God.Your playing small does not serve the world.There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.We were born to make manifest the glory ofGod that is within us.It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.And as we let our own light shine,we unconsciously give other peoplepermission to do the same.As we are liberated from our own fear,Our presence automatically liberates others.

-Marianne Williamson (often thought to be Nelson Mandela)

Parenting is the most important thing we do!
How well we do it will determine the LONG-RANGE HAPPINESS of our children (and of ourselves). Parenting is too important to leave to chance and too important to be approached defensively or by reaction.

Being Perfect is not lovable. Being lovable is lovable.

The limits you are living with right now, in every aspect of your existence, have been created by your mind. They are perceptions. And they are holding you back. You are capable of far more than you think you are. - Bill Phillips

Teachings of the Prophet Joseph Smith

I was called to be a teacher in the Relief Society recently and I am getting so much out of these lessons as I contemplate the messages in the Joseph Smith manual. It is so neat to apply the teachings to my life and my experiences and to draw connections and make paralells in the gospel.

Last week I taught the lesson on The Book of Mormon. As I read and prepared I was overcome with the knowledge that it is true and that Joseph Smith really did bring this ancienct scripture forth for our dispensation.

A few weeks ago we had the missionaries over to our home to teach one of Dallin's therapists the discussions. It had been a while since I had heard the discussions and I was filled with the spirit as the young men bore witness of the Book of Mormon. I was impressed with how the Book of Mormon is presented right away as something that sets our religion apart from others. It is not something that they just bring up later, it is right there and very key to the discussions.

Then, last week I noticed that the mormon documentary was being repeated on the PBS channel in our area. The first time it was presented I watched a little bit of it and just didn't feel good about what people were saying about the church so I didn't watch much. This time, I became a little bit more interested only because I was curious about how mormons are viewed and understood by the "world". As I watched, I thought, wow we really are wierd! Especially when you look through LDS history. I thought to myself, if I were not a member, would it be hard to believe all that such a peculiar church presents? With 13 million members, and rapid steady growth, there really is something to the gospel that draws people to it.

As I prepared my lesson about the book of mormon I reflected on these two experiences and the quote by Joseph Smith that the Book of Mormon is the keystone of our Religion. I really felt my testimony increase through really making the connection in my mind that the Book of Mormon is what brings people to the true gospel. It is true and when people read it, they feel the spirit tell them it is true. Without that book, I really don't think our religion would be where it is today. It is true and the Book of Mormon is truly the keystone of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.

"Nothing is impossible, some things just require more steps"

This rings so many chords to a mother battling autism.

President Hinckley

I am filled with joy and sadness as I reflect on the passing of this great prophet. At the age of 97, I could guess that a release from this life was a joyful experience as he was excepted into the arms of his wife and loved ones. President Hinckley was a prophet since I was in high school and his service has been such a wonderful time for our church. I loved to hear him speak with boldness and strength. He loved the Gospel and lived it his whole life. He made so many contributions to the church with technology and as a prophet with Temples. What a goal centered optimist. He saw so many great things for our church and brought them to pass. He saw the faces of those in other places and did whatever he could to bring them the opportunity of temple blessings. He always sparkled when he came into a room and spoke so positively and with a great sense of humor. I remember seeing him in conference and I loved the feeling that came over the room when he entered the room. He waved his cane at everyone which was so endearing that everyone laughed. I remember when I was in the BYU Women's Chorus when we preformed a concert in the new conference center. President Hinckley came and sat in the center of the front row. I felt like I was singing what was in my heart to him. I will always remember seeing him there and feeling my testimony grow as I watched him listen to our music. I loved hearing his 6 be's and all of the wisdom of his dress and grooming standards. I remember sitting in the living room of my college apartment and hearing him counsel against more than one pair of ear piercings. Having double holes in my ears, I vowed never to wear more than one pair again immediately. Because I have scars in my ears from the second hole, I will have to explain to my daughter why they are there. I am glad that I will be able to tell her that I followed the prophets council right away and never went back on that. President Hinckley was my prophet as I am sure many feel such a personal love for him. He was a great leader and prophet in the Latter Day dispensation.